Today is March 8. It's International Woman's Day..

Mum:
Happy holiday to you!

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-8 20:56 编辑 ].

真不错，赞一记.

My little sister ate a whole piece of banana just now. I ate a piece of banana too..

My Mum got a new laptop today! It looks different from the old one..

引用:

原帖由 钺钺妈妈 于 2010-3-9 10:01 发表
真不错，赞一记

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I bought two new chess exercise books today. We need them in our chess class..

My cousin visited us today. We had lunch together..

My Dad had a stomachache yesterday morning. My Mum took him to hospital to see the dactor. We all worried about him very much.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-14 21:12 编辑 ].

I got  a silver medal of the Math competion today..

I got  a fish  bone stuck in my throat. It went down after I drank some vinegar and swallowed  a big bite of rice..

I made a hat with an eagle on it!

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-17 20:52 编辑 ].

No homework today! Yee!.

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原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-17 20:45 发表
I made a hat with an eagle on it!

with the exclamation point...I reserve their use for something that I want to convey as though I shouted it.

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My grandpa is seriously sick with his heart disease.My Dad has been back to our hometown. Mum and I worry about grandpa very much.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-21 20:38 编辑 ].

Dad wasn't at home this weekend. Mum took my littlle sister and I to have lunch at grammy's home.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-21 20:41 编辑 ].

We will have a swimming competition this Saturday. I will take part in several items..

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原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-21 20:37 发表
Dad wasn't at home this weekend. Mum took my littlle sister and I to have lunch at grammy's home.

Well done!.

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原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-21 20:32 发表
My grandpa is seriously sick with his heart disease.My Dad has been back to our hometown. Mum and I worry about grandpa very much.

My grandpa has been seriously sick ...............

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原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-21 20:32 发表
My grandpa is seriously sick with his heart disease.My Dad has been back to our hometown. Mum and I worry about grandpa very much.

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引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-22 19:54 发表
We will have a swimming competition this Saturday. I will take part in several items.

I think we'd probably say "events" rather than "items," here....
We will have a swimming competition this Saturday. I will take part in several events..

Thank you very much!.

We will have a swimming competition in two days. I will take part in several events.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-24 19:22 编辑 ].

There was a fire drill at our school today. They happen once a year.We all escapeed successfully.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-25 19:46 编辑 ].

Mum picked me up today after swimming because grandpa gets foot aches these days.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-26 17:08 编辑 ].

I got up very early this morning because I took part in the swimming competition today.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-28 19:28 编辑 ].

Daddy, Mommy and my sister Jasmine picked me up after chess class together this evening. We took some pictures of night scene on middle Huaihai Rd. on the way home. It was really beautiful.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-28 19:26 编辑 ].

Today, my grammy gets sick too. Now both my grandparents are in the hospital. We worry about them very much.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-28 19:27 编辑 ].

We are going to field trip the day after tomorrow..

引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-28 19:19 发表
Daddy, Mommy and my sister Jasmine picked me up after chess class together this evening. We took some pictures of night scene on middle Huaihai Rd. on the way home. It was really beautiful.

I'd put another comma after Jasmine, it separates the list of names. There should always be a space after a comm too.

The "On the way home..." sentence is missing an article. It should say either 'some pictures of the night scene" or "of a night scene." I'd tend toward "the." The use of "really" in the last sentence is redundant, I'd leave it out.
   
Daddy, Mommy and my sister Jasmine picked me up after chess class together this evening. We took some pictures of the night scene on middle Huaihai Rd. on the way home. It was beautiful..

引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-28 19:25 发表
Today, my grammy gets sick too. Now both my grandparents are in the hospital. We worry about them very much.

I'd leave the "too" off the first sentence. Each sentence should make sense on it's own and this one doesn't until you read the next sentence.

I'd put a comma after "Now,"

I'd say "I worry about them... " everything else in the paragraph is first person, introducing third person in this sentence makes the reader wonder, "just who is 'we' now?"

Today, my grammy gets sick. Now, both my grandparents are in the hospital. I worry about them very much..

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原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-29 21:09 发表
We are going to field trip the day after tomorrow.

I'd say: "We are going on a field trip the day after tomorrow.".

We are going to visit China pavilion today..

I got a new dictionary. It's an electronic dictionary. I like it very much.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-31 20:20 编辑 ].

We went to field trip today. In the morning, we toured Huangpu river by ship. In the afternoon, we watched two movies.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-31 20:57 编辑 ].

The watermelon is very delicious. One piece for my sister.One piece for me.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-1 19:18 编辑 ].

I got two students. They are Alex and Jody. They are from American. I'm going to teach them Chinese tomorrow morning.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-3 22:21 编辑 ].

My two students speak Chinese better than my English. We walked in the park and had lunch together today. I taught them some Chinese. They taught me some English too..

Daddy and Mummy took my sister and I to the Botanical Garden today. We had lunch with my chassmates and their parents in front of our tent. We shared a lot of food, fruits and drinks. We are very happy today. It's a beautiful day, and we're in the Botanical Garden..

Well done!.

We played basketball in our PE lesson today.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-11 20:05 编辑 ].

引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-31 07:47 发表
We are going to visit China pavilion today.

We are going to visit the China pavilion today..

引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-3-31 20:56 发表
We went to field trip today. In the morning, we toured Huangpu river by ship. In the afternoon, we watched two movies.

We went on a field trip today..

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原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-3 22:12 发表
I got two students. They are Alex and Jody. They are from American. I'm going to teach them Chinese tomorrow morning.

I've got two students. They are called Alex and Jody. They are from American. I'm going to teach them Chinese tomorrow morning..

引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-5 17:35 发表
Daddy and Mummy took my sister and I to the Botanical Garden today. We had lunch with my chassmates and their parents in front of our tent. We shared a lot of food, fruits and drinks. We are very happy today. It's a beautiful day, and we're in the Botanical Garden....

Watch our for the tenses!

Daddy and Mummy took my sister and I to the Botanical Garden today. We had lunch with my chassmates and their parents in front of our tent. We shared a lot of food, fruits and drinks.-----------past tense!

We are very happy today. It's a beautiful day, and we're in the Botanical Garden.-----present tense!.

Well done! Go ahead!.

引用:

原帖由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-4 20:37 发表
My two students speak Chinese better than my English. We walked in the park and had lunch together today. I taught them some Chinese. They taught me some English too.

oh, dear, cannot believe you're still doing this. it's a great way to practise your English writing.

in this sentence, I think using "in return" is more appropiate.

in the next sentence, Botanical Garden, I don't know about other counties, but in the States, they usually call it Botanic Garden..

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I tried an Olympic Math lesson yesterday afternoon. I felt it was a little difficult.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-11 20:04 编辑 ].

We visited the Air force base this morning. It was very interesting.

[ 本帖最后由 冰城来的男孩子 于 2010-4-11 20:33 编辑 ].